Thursday, July 28, 2011

Letting go and Moving on

Thursday, 28th July, 2011

Dear brother,

July almost comes to an end. I'm coming home :) I hope i can be a better brother for you this time around. Sorry about my absence.

Today, I want to share with you about Love, hurt, and letting go.

I just realized someone from my past (more than 8 years, I tell you), who used to be in love with me, are still in love with me. As flattering as it may sound, and as good it makes me feel, I just wish the other party could move on. Life's too short to dwell on an impossible love.

I should know. Many times I was at the other end of the spectrum. Wondering what they were doing. Dreaming of one day they would change their mind. Hating them. And then hating yourself for letting them go.

Love does crazy things to people.

As I grow, the recovery time from such hurt shorten. These days it takes me about 2 bottles of wine and a week to be back on my feet (It took me about 5 years to get over TR, 3 years to get over Q). But 8 years. 8 years someone spent thinking that one day I would change my mind, without me even knowing it. I have moved on so fast. They still act as if it was high school.

So brother, be careful. You are starting high school in a month. And high school is a time of all craziness, puppy love, and lots and lots of struggles. Just remember to be kind to others, and yet be kind to yourself. Let go and learn from mistakes, and move ahead. Sometimes giving up is the best option.

 Remember, life is short. A minute dwell on the past or spending on impossible love is a minute wasted from living the present, and meeting new people. They could be the one. It's easy to be obsessed with someone, and attach to them and cling on to them all the love and hate that you have. But be brave. Challenge yourself to the whole new world.

Love is out there. Even though right now I'm in a bit of an emotional mess (all my fault, mind you), I do believe that one day I'd be happy. Loved happy. Not settled happy, pretend happy. Happy

So brother. Love. Love all you can. Hurt all you must. But once you learn to let go and move on, there's true happiness somewhere at the end of the rainbow.

With love

Wednesday, July 13, 2011

Live life without regrets

Wednesday, July 13th, 2011,

Dear bro,

It's been a while.

I'm sorry you didn't get to the high school you wanted. It must be hard. I'm sorry. I wish I could be there with you in this time. I know the feeling of being disappointed in yourself. I know you are a brave mature kid who puts up a straight face, but it is not easy, nonetheless.

I can tell you, though, that it would all be ok. It may look like a step back right now, but it will somehow unfold itself in the future. Just be brave and hang in there, it will be fine eventually. Some day when you look back, maybe when you see this, it would have all been resolved for the better. I'll be back home soon, I promise.

I turned down one job offer from the US itself. I know. It is kinda strange when you wanted to go, and nothing was there. And once you reach a new place, they started coming in. I just know, that I'm not regretting it. I love what I am doing right now. I do miss home, but I guess I'm doing great preparation steps for my careers. It maybe much slower pace than what I am used to, but I shall take this as an opportunity to rest my weary soul and better myself for the next chapters in life.

I made my decisions generally base on one question, "If I die tomorrow, will this be something I would quote as part of my life?". Morbid, I know, but in life when you make decisions knowing that time is short, and you can't afford to hesitate, you'd make one that you won't regret. It might be a mistake, but that's a mistake you need to make.

So brother, hang in there. I know it looks pretty bleak right now the way mom and dad portrait it. But I am with you 100% and we will be ok. I just want you to enjoy your childhood as the amazing kid that you are, and the rest will come in time. I had the luck and the chance to choose my own paths without regrets when I was younger, and I'll do everything within my power for you to have that, too.

With love.